How to Overcome Fear of What Others Think

I've always been pretty expressive with my body when it comes to movement. In a way I find it easier to express how I feel through my body than through my words. In particular through dance.

Non verbal communication is the way we express ourselves in the world without speech. A form of self-expression. This may be through body language or the look in your eyes when you lock eyes with someone you like. For me, as far back as I remember dance has been a catalyst for self-expression. A way to shake, stretch, lose my thoughts to the beat of the drum. Sometimes just letting my body move in whatever way it wants to. Other times it is following specific steps by learning salsa, African dance (niko u know) or tango.

We are innately born to move our bodies. To dance, jump, stretch. However there is one little thing that gets in the way of that sometimes..

And that's worrying what other people think of us..

See, we have what is called 'spotlight bias', or 'spotlight effect'. A bias that influences your experience in the world and makes you believe that everyone is paying attention to you.

You're getting ready on a Saturday night to go out. Or to a job interview. Or to a date. You're panicking about what to wear worrying what everyone is going to think of your clothes. Worrying that you're not going to dress to the mark. Or even worse, OVER DRESS (GOD FORBID). You finally pick an outfit after days of stressing out.

Sound familiar?

It's not the clothes that matter, it's how you carry yourself in the clothes. Your self-expression in the clothes.

It could even go a step further, where 'spotlight effect' takes over so much that it stops you from doing something. I have lost count how many conversations I have had with friends and clients that have told me they didn't speak up because they were too worried about being misunderstood.

Whether it is dancing erratically, standing tall in clothes that you have worn 100 times already, or public speaking, remember that you are there because people LOVE you! Your voice deserves to be heard! People are too busy concentrating on what shi*t is going on in their own lives to judge you.

One way to overcome this is to reflect on how you feel about yourself. To what extent are you letting other peoples opinions of you dictate your life? Can you take a breath, step back, and ask yourself 'So What?' 'Who Cares?!'

The path to growth is found through putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations! By expressing yourself in your unique way you are shining your light out into the world.